Results of Pelvic Ultrasound & Helpful Female Links

 Drinking: Cuppa (mint) Tea

So I had a doctor's phone call appointment this morning, found out some results of my ultrasound (I need to see a Gynae to get a full rundown of the results.) What I know so far is that I have an enlarged uterus, my right ovary is larger than my left and I more than likely have another condition called Adenomyosis .

From what I can gather it's not unusual to have this as well as having Endometriosis, Endo grows on the outside of the uterus and Adenomyosis grows on the inside and is more common in women who have had children (given birth to). Treatment usually involves anti-inflammatories, warm baths and heat bags. The usual non-helpful things I use for Endo anyway. Apparently post menopause it is supposed to go away on its own, but a hysterectomy can assist with the process.

This link I found informative for my current situation: https://www.jeanhailes.org.au/resources/uterus-cervix-ovaries-fact-sheet

And if you're concerned about the Covid-19 Vax and your female health this link provides some facts (edited in November 2021) https://assets.jeanhailes.org.au/Fact_sheets/Women-and-the-COVID-19-Vaccines-Your-questions-answered.pdf?_ga=2.220534800.965995592.1642600672-2115779845.1642600672

Pelvic Ultrasound Day

 Drinking: 1 Litre of Water

Early in 2021 I asked my doctor for a referral to get a pelvic ultrasound done.... One year on I've finally booked that appointment and am currently drinking the required litre of water. I cannot believe it has taken me this long to get it done!

Not done yet though, I got to finish drinking the water first by 1:30pm, then I have to hold on to that water - no toilet breaks!! Then get to my appointment. I'm fairly certain I am having both an external and an internal exam done today.

I have been trying to recall how long ago I had my last laparoscopy it would have to be a few years ago now and I am fairly certain it was postpartum (after Henry) as I had a D&C done too. 

It probably sounds a little weird, but I am hoping it is just Endometriosis pains and nothing worse.

Post Christmas Hubbabaaloo

 Drinking: Iced Latté | Eating: A Cinnamon Donut

Oh my gosh! Where did the November and December go??

I'm fairly certain for the most part I was in pain, a lot of pain, both physically and mentally, so much so I haven't even been blogging or doing much in the way of living - just surviving.

I dreaded the thought of Christmas day this year (errm last year now 2021) because my mother-in-law had not slept over at our house at all during the year of 2021. This was due to how much she kept making jealous remarks to her son (my hubby) about me as well as blaming me for everything that went wrong in our lives. Carrying around such negativity has clearly not done anyone any favours. It was arranged she would sleep over at our house on Christmas Eve AND Christmas Night. 

Even in my own home I found I had to play by her rules, ridiculous right?! That whilst she was here we had to not be on our mobiles at-all. We had to always be present in the same room as her - basically had to keep her company throughout the day and night. I am not okay with any of these rules, it is my house. 

Christmas Eve was semi-okay we stayed at home and watched a Christmas movie as a family in the lounge - she had to have a few alcoholic beverages. We had bought her a bottle of Bundaberg Rum as her Xmas Present. Christmas Day she drunk a bottle of white wine to herself at my parents place - where we had Christmas lunch with all of the family, when we came home in the late arvo she moved on to a cuppa coffee and was apparently going to have a sleep in the lounge room. We told her we were going to be out the front in the garden sitting in the late arvo sun and the welcoming cool breeze and that she was more than welcome to join us. But no she wanted to be inside and wanted us to be inside with her I guess as well. Hubby put a movie on for her - but she never went to sleep - even if she had claimed she had not gotten any sleep for 2 days. Her memory has become very unreliable not mention her lying is terrible. Hubby and I both were witness to this during her stay with us. 

Anyway, late Christmas night whilst the two of them were watching a movie together, it started - or rather grew into a violent outburst or hurling words and physical blows. She was drunk - very drunk and very nasty. I think it was about midnight if not close to, that I remember hubby saying he was going to call the police if she did not sit back in her seat and calm down.

The police were called, once by him and again by me.

The whole event has dampened the Christmas spirit for me personally, I already dread the next Christmas. 

My mother in law was physically punching my hubby in his head whilst he was attempting to drive her home to her house, as we were told to do by the police. I knew this would happen to him, I also know that she is a psycho and albeit somehow has crazy strength at the worst of times. My daughter (15 years old) stood there out on the street and yelled at her Nanna to get the hell off of her Dad. Wow what an amazing moment that was hearing her say that.

His mum, her Nanna, the boys Nanna, my mother-in-law is no longer welcome in our home.

I am hoping to have at least a 12 month break from her negative jealous self, and should she ever be back she needs to have fully finished a rehab program for alcoholics and see a psychiatrist. She hasn't seen the latter for about 5 years because he retired.

I haven't recovered from that night, that incident, however one of the next things I did was to remove every little item that reminded me of her from my home, including the chair she slept in whilst here, the mug she always drank from and things like that.

Endo Pains, Life with Kids, dog attack & Halloween 2021

Drinking: peppermint tea  |  Listening to: Rag'n'Bone Man on Spotify

Endo (Endometriosis) pains are earlier this month, I'm not quite at the 48th day of the cycle just yet (I think it's next Monday) but oh my gawd! Pains in my thighs running down from my pelvis and stabbing pains in my ovaries, combined with that all too familiar deep ache somewhere near my cervix. It all just seems to have come on out of the blue. By the way I'm hiding away in my bedroom because Tilli has forewarned that she is in a REALLY BAD mood, so I let her walk home from the bus stop today. Blair is pissing me off. Lord I am really trying to be there for them all, sometimes, just sometimes you can't. I can't.

A lot of stress has been happening at the moment at home with the kids, with my health, with finance. I know, I know story of everyone's life - this is normal though. This is what our normal is. Crazy, busy, stressful and PAINFUL! I went out of my way last night to make something that I thought my daughter Tilli could try to eat (she's fussy with her food) and given that she has been enjoying scrambled eggs lately I thought I would also try her on a vegetable quiche and serve hers with the salad that she (usually) enjoys eating. It wasn't much trouble for me to make the salad it's only mixed greens with shaved Parmesan cheese and sliced cucumber; no condiments or seasonings - though just between you and me I did add salt and pepper this time. I also had some of the salad with my slice of quiche and heated up fish fingers and chicken fingers for the boys. Yes, it was a bit of a mix-matched dinner but each to their own. Plus I finally got to have a bloody quiche! 

Tilli on learning that dinner was a quiche said no thanks, I don't wanna try it, so I added that I had also put on a few of the chicken fingers for her as backup though she couldn't have many as I needed them for the boys. She seemed to not want any of the salad before even eating some, I had put it in the fridge momentarily to keep it fresh, it wasn't cold at all, yet she told me it was too cold on her teeth and refused to eat any of it. And this is coming from the teenager that crunches on ice-cubes!! Disappointed mumma here. Apparently the chicken fingers were over done, so they were too hard for her to eat and inside them was not a lot of chicken meat. Overly critical children are hard to accommodate. Henry also refused to eat much of his plate of chicken/fish fingers though he did eat his one tiny potato with butter on it, I was happy about that. And surprisingly he turned his nose up at the tomato sauce bottle. Weird! Blair on the other hand on thinking he had started disliking fish fingers actually ate ALL of his and Henry's and Tilli's chicken fingers too. Blair had mixed vegies with his and the buttered spuds. Hubby had the same but with a huge slice of quiche.

Anyway, I enjoyed dinner.

* * *

Had Halloween recently - well back on the 31st October, I wasn't sure how many trick-a-treaters we would get this year, and in the end we actually had a little less then the previous year both due to Covid-19.

 

The blue-fairy lights from Christmas 2020 have been sparkling all year under the big Acacia tree out the front, so I decided to add this year's Halloween spider web to it as well, creating an archway along the slate path. That's our old cat - Molly, we adopted her from the RSPCA quite a few years ago now, she's about 11 years old.

* * *

We didn't want to adopt another dog after Goucho left us for doggie heaven, however a couple of weeks later Skye our Jack Russell x Whippet was really struggling. We had originally adopted Skye from the RSPCA as a companion for Goucho, so all she had known and grown up with from the age of 8 weeks old was having a brother bigger than her. So we did a bit of searching online via the RSPCA and found a beautiful looking dog called Sterling who had come from a bit of a troubled past it seemed, he was 5 years old and 4 months and we were told that in his previous home he was picked on by a bigger dog but grew up with a little baby, and slept at night with a cat. So, after about 2 weeks of having Sterling we unfortunately had to surrender him to the RSPCA because he violently attacked our little Skye. That was a horrible event to witness happen but it was the right thing to do. Sometimes being a parent and having to make these kind of decisions is really hard. 

I had just started to get a soft spot for Sterling - he was like a HUGE (teddy) bear, I still feel sorry for him, sorry he couldn't stay with us and be a part of our family. I hope he finds a more suitable forever home. 

Skye was badly injured though from the attack we took her to the local vet and got her eye lid looked at, we got some ointment for it and a course of pain killers and antibiotics as well. She was also injured near her neck region and a couple of small nicks around her face. Her eye lid was really bad though and she was extremely lucky it wasn't any lower otherwise she would have lost an eye in the attack. There was so much blood everywhere when it happened, I got a lot of it on me. She is much better now though, everything has healed nicely.

My 48 Day cycle post Contraceptive Pill & other ramblings

Listening to: Soft Pop & R&B on Spotify
Eating: Banana Walnut Muffin | Drinking: Green Tea

I had a tough week, spent most of it in bed with #Endometriosis pains and a period that has been coming every 48 days (now) since I was forced to stop taking the pill. My period was achy legs and thighs, migraines and no sleep. And of course heavy bleed with black clots.

I'm pretty sure (despite my GP's thoughts) I have started #perimenopause . The symptoms of which overlap with #Fibromyalgia a lot!

I was ever-so grateful that hubby stepped up and took over a lot of what I do around the house. It was unbelievably nice to have dinner made for me (and the family) every night. To know that I was not alone in looking after the household - including feeding the 2 dogs and the cat.

I spent Thursday mostly in bed still but got up in the arvo and then today I chose to support hubby on a scrap metal run. Granted I did not physically do much, I couldn't my hip bursitis was giving me no end of grief. Hauling poles onto the trailer in the gusty chill wind that came in over the southerly part of the sea at Goolwa Beach; Brrrr! that was the pick-up that made my body ache all over. And that all to knowing burn feeling in the legs like you've run a marathon. Ouchies as I carefully pulled my own legs up into the car afterwards, to head off to the next pick-up.

I'm most definitely not as strong as I used to be, and I really do still overestimate my strength. I think that would have to be one of the hardest things dealing with Fibro for me - is not being able to move a pot plant when I want to, and having to wait instead for hubby (occasionally my youngest son). I love being in the garden amongst my plants, but bending over once... is pushing it, bending over more than that and I'm going to be in agony shortly after.

I hate having to consider keeping a little in my battery tank (so to speak) so I can get back inside and wash my hands without being in too much pain.

In the car today, somewhere between Victor Harbour and Goolwa South I tried to brush some dog hair off of my pants, OMG did that hurt! My touch was light, non-existent, but it hurt. I remember explaining this to hubby. Sometimes I wonder if even he thinks it's insane, that I'm making it up. The stupid #fibrobody

Suffice to say I will more than likely be in a flare tomorrow - and tomorrow is wash day. I'm planning on thinking #happythoughts #pinkelephantsinleotards I do not want to feed that #fattyamigdala

[Shoutout to #Emmawarnepsychology ]

--------------

As written originally on my facebook personal blog > https://www.facebook.com/bohemiansolitude/posts/116951824084486

HELPFUL LINKS:

Pelvic Pain

Endometriosis

4 Stages of Endo

Perimenopause

Women's Health

Migraines...

 Drinking: Black Tea | Eating: wholemeal toast with Vegemite

I hate migraines! I hate a lot of things come to think of it, my body's neurological system is a wreck. I've been having migraines - the classic ones with the tummy ache and nausea first as well as the aura ones - those latter ones are awful. I get like a kaleidoscope of flashing lights for what seems like ages either out of both eyes or just the one eye - usually my good eye. I can still kind of see but not so great, and it leaves me feeling dizzy and overwhelmed. I was trying to hang up a load of washing last Friday when one started. It didn't dawn on me that it was going to be a migraine because I rarely get aura ones. Wouldn't have mattered anyway because I can't take any painkillers to help reduce the pain.

I can't take pain killers for anything at the moment! Nothing I take seems to be working. Is it like a massive bad batch or something?? So I put up with the aches and pains of it all, whether it be Endometriosis, Fibromyalgia or migraine! If I had to do a would you rather scenario here I would rather Endo and Fibro at the same time than a bloody migraine.

Anyway I finally got in to see my doctor, it's taken like a month of Sunday's to make it there as I kept on picking up a bug. And that meant that I would have to face a barrage of Covid related questions and more than likely not be allowed to have a face-to-face appointment; of which I have been desperately needing to find out my blood test results and query the cyst on the brain that I read in the report from the MRI I had a few weeks ago now. AND to do a new mental health plan.

So... on telling my doctor about my migraines she told me she wants me to stop taking the pill. The Pill! The Contraceptive Pill!! For various reasons - mainly because it is probably why I am getting migraines all the time now, which puts me at much greater risk of a stroke (among other things). I never was taking the pill to stop me from getting pregnant - I started it way back when I was in my early twenties (prior to sex even becoming a factor). It was recommended to me by a sexual health social worker through SHINE with whom I was seeing in regards to a really awful internet date that happened in the late 1990s. Yeah my first date from a dude I met online - screwed me up for many years. One could say - at least I survived it - because I very nearly didn't. 

Anyway I have been taking the Pill for about 25 years now I reacon and suddenly being told to not take it is like a slap in the face - I think I am going to listen to this advice this time is because of the enormous risk I now have facing me if I do continue to take the pill. But to walk away from my doctor with no pain relief from the migraines is a tad disconcerting. I shouldn't have to be - used to pain; there should be some kind of relief out there for me. I can't take Codeine and I'm allergic to Penicillin.

I started writing this blog entry last night and I guess I should really finish up writing it tonight. I have so much to say on this topic. My head and my neck are killing me and have been for well over 14 days now. And yeah I am used to the intensity of this pain and I've had enough of it on top of everything else. 

I am on night 2 of not having the pill. I was the kind of woman that skipped her periods indefinitely as my way of escaping the Endo pains - it would work for the most part until some invisible cycle whooshed around again and the pains would be agonising. This past year or so has been Endo pains combined with Fibro pains. It's been hell! There's been no relief - and now it's going to get worse and there's nothing I can do about it. It's going to be Endo pains plus the irregular heavy bleeding and everything else. 

 

June has Hooned by

 Drinking: Peppermint Tea | Eating: Fruit Toast

Wow! Where did June go? Trying to add a new function to allow people to follow my blog as I just noticed the feed-burner one is ending. Typical! And it's already been one whole month since I posted last. I have been busy working admin for Turf Terminator and taking bookings for a scrap metal service. When I go out on the scrap runs I do the navigating, which I don't mind doing. And when I'm not working I'm trying to muster the oomph to get out of bed. Last night I was is so much pain I couldn't even get a restful sleep, which I do realise does not help fibro one little bit. It's been a little while since it's been that bad. I've been desperately trying to keep my stress levels down as a way of combating the pain levels, particularly as the usual Ibuprofen is not working. It's like what's the point I put up with the aches and pains and then the burning nerve pain on top of that and the sensory issues. I really don't know what to do when simple meds don't work like they used to, even with a few days break in-between taking them. I caught some kind of bug around my birthday on the 8th June and I've been sick on and off since then, it actually knocked me out I was bedridden for a few days; hubby was very worried about me. You can't even see a doctor these days when you're that unwell because everyone freaks that it's Covid-19.

It's been absolutely freezing lately, we don't have central heating in our home, and only one gas wall heater (in the lounge)- one of the those old upright ones on the wall. The lounge is a lovely temp but you certainly know when it's really cold as our bedrooms falls to about 10 degrees Celsius inside. I currently have my bedroom door shut and a little 2000 watt electric heater blowing hot air onto my thighs. I worry about the dollars this is going to cost me in the next bill as these kind of heaters can cost a heck of a lot of money to run. But in all honesty I think I would rather pay the bill then be freezing cold and in more pain. 

I've been keeping myself busy in my meagre down time with sorting my Pin boards out on Pinterest - I had like over 200 boards!! That's ridiculous, no wonder my followers were reducing they probably took one look and though - no way. There used to be a time when you could follow particular boards and not just the whole lot, I wish they would bring that aspect back in. I've also tried to get on to my Fashmates profile and create some more sets, that seems harder to get back into. I want to upload some more stock-art to my deviantart account too, but am yet to manage that one. I've just been way too busy with work and looking after the house.

Mother in Law's full-stop

Drinking: water    |     Eating: Cinnamon Donuts

We had my hubby's mother over the other day (Easter Sunday), I have to follow all these ridiculous rules when we visit her at her house AND at my house! One of these rules - the main one, is to not be on our mobile phones whilst she is around. I hate this rule because at her house I'm usually just sitting there - bored. Last time I went on my phone because nothing was happening, no body was talking to me, no body was talking at all, and the second I went on my phone she got angry with me and proceeded to start entering a conversation. Seriously!

Anyhow I did my best with her at our house, I remained near by, I started conversations, I made sure to look after her needs etc.. etc.. She was there from about 3pm to 9pm. Yes, she also stayed for dinner - which I made a lovely roast chook and veg, with Yorkshire puddings. She never understands why I make Yorkshires with a chicken roast dinner, because traditionally they are made with a lamb roast (I think).

I always feel like my fibro pain is in competition with her pains, she does not accept any help for her pains - no physio, no massage, nothing,  just very strong painkillers (Panadiene forte). I do not understand how they can possibly still be effective against her pain (back pain mostly). She also takes Lyrica for apparent nerve pain I think in her back. She is on an anti-psychotic med that is only available in Australia on a trial basis currently. And takes Valium quite a lot as well often skipping her prescription meds, taking them with a lot of alcohol and smoking considerably. I have accepted all manner of help for the fibro pains and am still trying different methods to deal/live with it. Don't get me wrong I have had chronic pains all my life - mostly undiagnosed Endometriosis.

I would have thought (again) she would have had more compassion for another woman with chronic pains, alas no. Her theory for my fibro fog was hilarious, "it must be something you recall from your childhood.." was her explanation for why I kept referring to elastic bands as sultanas. My fibro-fog has been ridiculously bad of late - there is a significant difference between calling the microwave - the fridge or your child the wrong name of one of your other children; that's different. Fibro fog is hellish in my opinion.

~

I've attempted several times to write this blog entry today, it is now nearly 8:30pm on a Friday night and I am tired with a severely painful left arm - which I am fairly certain is not related to an impending heart attack but it does make me worry. I think it is aching from driving too much yesterday it started in my wrists but has radiated up my left arm. It needs some trigger therapy on it for relief.

The Pain Handbook

This book is the most brilliant piece of information I have read recently, 

it was printed in Adelaide, South Australia.

The explain PAIN & protectometer

No matter what your diagnosis or condition, 

nor how long you have had your pain for,

learning about PAIN is helpful.

However it does require 3 things:

Patience

Persistence

Courage

~

This book is based on scientific evidence,

written by a Neuroscience clinician - Lorimer Moseley and

David Butler an educator with clinical and research roles.

They have over 60 years between them of experience in this field.

Through reading this book we can understand:

- why we are hurting

- be able to tell others why

- know what methods of movement/exercise to use

- no how to help our pain

- be able to help others

- discover our dims & sims

(dim = danger in me message & safety in me message)