Loneliness though Married

 I'm so lonely...

I try to talk to him, but I always feel like I am being shut down.That he doesn't have the time to talk to me, even if it's a brief moment, a few seconds of time to ask something so simple. Sadness has seeped in now that I cannot even have (true) personal time with my hubby. It's not too much to ask, nor should I even have to. I have great conversations with my 6 year old - but that's different, although he acts like he's a teenager. I yearn to have someone of my age and intellect to communicate with. I have no emotional or intellectual connection.

It seems to be a bit of a trigger as well, in my past emotions and affection were controlled by my partner at the time. 

He seems to have all the time in the world for his mate, he makes time for him, but not me, all we do is argue. he doesn't know me anymore, I love him so much, yet I don't love this feeling, I don't love the hole that's creeping in my heart, the part of me that yearns to be touched, a hand to be held, a hug to hide. I feel broken. I've even told him that I am yearning for an emotional and intellectual connection - yet he doesn't have it in him. I feel like I am dying, a part of me is dying the part of me that is love. He seemed to freak out when he thought I wanted to end our marriage - seriously this is not that, although it does feel a little like a broken heart because his new passion is his mate. He messages him all the time, a few times a day, he plays an online game with him all the time. He works with him. I don't think it is his mate's fault - I think it is what my hubby wants to do. 

It hurts so much.

We've become so distant, he doesn't even seem a part of life anymore, even though we live in the same home. We're like passing shadows of what we once were.

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I need someone, please is there anyone, is there someone listening to me. 

I've tried talking to my imagination, but no one hears me anymore.

I've cried too many times, yet there is no emotion.

No one is there for me.

Alone.